Musings of a Muddled Mother

Got Kids?

2010-01-19T12:09:00.000-08:00

Last week was one of THOSE weeks. You know, one of those weeks where you feel you might be left bald by the time it's over because you your kids drive you so nuts you pull all your hair out! Doubly FUN for me since I'm in the middle of post-pregnancy hair-loss anyway!

Well, on one of the days of this particularly wonderful week, my husband got home, and I immediately passed him the baton and asked if I could stop running. He's wonderful. He always tells me that he will take care of it, and to take all the time I need.

So, I left and headed to - where else? - Deseret Book. What better place to go when you're feeling like a crappy mom? So in a matter of just a few minutes after walking in the door, I had a stack of about ten books that I was considering. After almost an hour, I narrowed it down to four: Two books on motherhood, one on fun dates, and one called What to Say in Any Situation ('cause let's not forget, I live with my foot in my mouth. What a perfect book!).
This turned out to be the BEST and the one that will probably become dog-eared and completely destroyed over the years because of how much I will refer to it (even though I think the phrase SANE MOTHER is a complete oxymoron).

This morning, I had just put my daughter down for a nap, and was sitting in the bathroom reading this book while my son was taking a bath. Now, bath time is usually pretty great. I get some time to catch up on some reading, and he gets to play. The problem always comes when it's time to wash his hair. He simply does not understand the concept of putting his head back so that the water doesn't get in his face. And he insists on screaming so loudly, that he can't hear my explanation for why he should do it (yeah, like a two-year-old REALLY cares when you're trying to reason with him). So this is how the scene inevitably goes:

Me: Ok, sweetie, in about two minutes, I need to wash your hair, ok? It'll be fun! We'll see how fast we can get it done! (said with as much enthusiasm as humanly possible)

Ty: (immediate frown appears) NO!! (whining and crying ensues)

(I ignore him, until the two minutes have gone by, then quietly stand up and get the shampoo and rinse cup and gently ask him to look up at the ceiling. Or I might try laughingly looking up at the ceiling myself, acting like there's something funny to see up there. Pretty soon it escalates.)

Me: Ty, just look at the light. It will be so quick, I promise!

Ty: AAAHHHH!!! NOOOOOO!!!! AAHHHHH!!!

Me: Would you...PLEASE...ALL you have to do is....

Ty: AHHHHH!!!! NOOOOO!!!! AHHHHHH!!!!

(by now I'm soaked from all the thrashing and splashing)

Me: Would you just listen for a minute ....FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY, HOLD STILL!

So anyway, not looking forward to this little scene today, I took a tiny piece of advice from this book: There is nothing wrong with a little bribing if it's not used TOO often. Usually I only bribe Ty with some candy if we're at a store and he's being crazy. He loves M&M's and that will always do the trick. Today, remembering that I had a few stashed away for our next outing, I calmly told him that if he let me wash his hair without the usual warfare, I would give him a few candies. He immediately put on his smile. Then I asked him to put his head back, and he did. He was quiet, and so I was able to make it into a game, and he ended up loving it. Then I made such a BIG, FAT, HUGE deal out of the fact that he had done it so well (another piece of advice in this book), that he was laughing really hard by the time we were all done. Miracle. I have a feeling I'll never have to deal with this particular issue again, even without the candy because he finally saw that if he puts his head back, he doesn't get water in his face! AMAZING!

For the next couple of hours, if I saw him doing something good, or something that I had asked him to do, I made sure to act like he had saved the world or something. His attitude completely changed. I mean, I usually praise him when he does something good, but never so HUGELY, especially for tiny things that don't seem to matter so much. Well, I found out that a lot of praise goes a long way! Also, I learned some great ways to get kids to help with the housework. I can't wait to keep reading!

Pick up this book if you're needing some tips. Many of the things are for older children, but it never hurts to start building up your strategy now!

And the Website of the Month is...

2010-01-14T15:04:00.000-08:00

Is it just me, or is it sometimes really hard to think of things to do to entertain kids? I just found an awesome website that has TONS of really great activity ideas. You can sign up and then tag your favorite activities to your own folder. Then just click on that when your little one is getting bored and there you have it! A whole list of easy ideas!

www.saavysource.co m

Fire-Starting Soup

2010-01-11T08:31:00.000-08:00

In the past two months I have really gotten into cooking. I love finding great recipes to try. The place I go most frequently is Rachael Ray's website. I think we have loved just about every recipe of hers that I've used. One of those was this recipe for chicken noodle soup:

http://rachaelray.com/recipe.php?recipe_id=2728

Try it. It's amazing. And don't ignore the spices! I used to think that the spices were no big deal and that if I didn't use them, it would turn out the same. HELLO! They are what makes all the difference. I decided to use fresh herbs in this recipe and it turned out amazing...despite the fact that I almost started a fire in the house.

I didn't realize that I had spilled some oil inside one of the burners at some point that week until I was making this soup and the smoke detectors started going off. It just looked like regular steam and I didn't see any black smoke, so I didn't understand what was going on. But as Grandma and I fanned the smoke detector and opened all the doors and windows, I glanced back in the kitchen and saw flames shooting up out of the burner around the pot. Grandma got it out fast, but the smoke detectors kept going off. Both of my kids were taking naps so I ran downstairs, expecting to hear screaming. But no, they were still sound asleep and stayed asleep for another hour. How is it possible that running water from the bathroom can wake them up during the night, but ear-splitting sirens right above their heads do nothing? Seriously?

So, try the recipe, but make sure you haven't spilled any oil in your burners beforehand, k? :)

Free Education!

2010-01-06T13:01:00.000-08:00

When I finally graduated from college in 2006 I remember being so excited that I was "done" with school. Well, now I really miss it. Learning is so cool!! On my own, I've been trying to learn to do some things that interest me. Like drawing. I've always been AWFUL at drawing, or any type of art, for that matter. For Christmas, my husband got me a drawing book. When I saw it I wasn't all that excited because I thought, "I'm awful at drawing, and I'll never be able to do it." But then started reading the book and doing some of the exercises that it has in it. Result: I drew a pretty dang decent tree and a couple pretty decent-looking bottles! I know, nothing extremely exciting, but it made me realize that with more practice, I really WILL be able to draw. Never say never.

My point: keep learning, even when you're done with school. I just found out that BYU offers a whole bunch of online courses for free. I didn't know! When I found the site yesterday I got all sorts of excited about all of the new things I'm going to learn online. Like how to grow vegetables, fruits and nuts; and how to BOWL...and how to speak English as a second language if my first language is Chinese (ok, maybe not that one). The one I decided to start with is personal finance. I graduated with a degree in finance and yet I still do so poorly with managing our personal finances! So I am super excited!

Here's the link: http://ce.byu.edu/is/site/courses/free.cfm

Happy Learning!

Mamma Mia!

2010-01-04T16:08:00.000-08:00

Last Friday night I felt like Lorelai Gilmore sitting next to Sookie St. James at Miss Patty's dance recital, as children in colorful costumes sporting "Jazz Hands" danced through the aisles. I felt my cheeks getting red and my eyes widening as yet another person burst into song on the TV screen. After nearly an hour, I turned to look at my husband sitting next to me and realized he had the exact same expression on his face. It was about then that we turned the movie off. I would have sat through it, but he insisted that he just couldn't. We agreed that Mamma Mia was just a little bit too cheesy. I'll probably sit down and watch the rest of it someday because I do want to know what happens, but I was definitely disappointed. What was all the fuss about? I thought this was supposed to be one of the best movies ever (or so I was led to believe by various women exclaiming, "OH, that is the BEST movie EVER!").

So, maybe I'm not entirely qualified to make this criticism, since I didn't see the whole movie, but then again maybe I am. I think a "good" movie should be "good" or compelling all the way through. There should be something that makes you want to keep watching. And frankly, the only thing in Mamma Mia was something that kept making me want to grimace, or flinch, or maybe hide my head in my hands in embarrassment.

Here's my theory on all the hype of Mamma Mia. It's just like Krispy Kreme. When I was a freshman in college a Krispy Kreme doughnut shop opened in Orem, Utah. I had never had a Krispy Kreme doughnut. I had only ever heard of Krispy Kreme because magazine articles touted them as, basically, doughnut shop of the stars. This celebrity loves to grab a Krispy Kreme doughnut on the way to the studio, and that celebrity loves having coffee and a Krispy Kreme doughnut while taking a long walk on the beach in the morning, etc, etc. So if celebrities like them, they MUST be good! When they opened in Orem my roommates and I decided to go down and get some. It must have been almost midnight and the drive-thru line was ENDLESS! But we waited anyway and were rewarded with an assortment of soft, warm doughnuts. Oh they were good all right, but definitely not the best I've ever tasted, and definitely not worth waiting an hour for. The same thing, in my opinion, is happening with In-N-Out. Sure, their stuff is good, but, really? You want to sit in a line for an hour to get one of their hamburgers?

And Mamma Mia...it started in London and was huge on Broadway and they sing ABBA songs and ...(insert loud, girly scream here) OH MY GOSH it's a movie now and it's going to be the BEST movie EVER!

Ok, yeah, that was a dumb comparison (and yes, I know I'll probably get slammed by many people who grew up in the Southeast and knew and loved Krispy Kreme before it reached California at all!), and maybe it really is a great movie. I guess I won't know until I sit down and watch the rest of it. And maybe I'll love it so much that I'll take my husband on a trip to Greece, and we'll rent a boat, and I'll row him over to the little island, and THEN...(DOT DOT DOT)!!!

The Perfect Word

2009-12-27T12:32:00.000-08:00

In the fashion of the head of a household who brings all of his guests to order and thanks them for coming to his home, I guess I should do the same. Thanks for being here! I guess I should explain what "here" is. This is basically my writing laboratory. I love writing. I wrote a book that is technically complete, but still FAR from actually being done. One day I hope to send it out to try and get it published, but I feel like I need to step away from it for a little bit and do some other things. I think my next project is going to be a children's book, but whatever that next step may be, I need to write every day. What better way than a blog, right? And what better subject than this crazy, hectic, frustrating, funny, wonderful and blessed situation called MOTHERHOOD.

Now you understand the "Mother" part of the title, and if you know me, you probably understand the "Muddled" part too. But here is the explanation, (compliments of dictionary.com), definitions in bold applying more specifically to myself:

Muddle -

-verb (used with object)
1. to mix up in a confused or bungling manner; jumble.

2. to cause to become mentally confused.

3. to cause to become confused or stupid or as if with an intoxicating drink.

4. to make muddy or turbid, as water.

-verb (used without object)
5. to proceed, behave, or think in a confused or aimless fashion or with an air of improvisation.

-noun
5. the state or condition of being muddled, esp. a confused mental state.

6. a confused, disordered or embarrassing condition; mess

-verb phrase
Muddle through - to achieve a certain degree of success but without much skill, polish, experience, or direction.

Oh yes, that is definitely the definition of ME. And not just as applies to motherhood, but really, many aspects of my life. When I was a teenager, my bedroom was always a mess. One of my best friends gave me a picture book for Christmas entitled Franklin is Messy. Pretty obvious hint, wouldn't you say? Not only is it challenging for me to keep my house clean, especially now that I have two kids, but I am also constantly inserting my foot into my mouth. And yes I love to try doing things that I have never done before, and it is never in any organized, methodical way. I get an idea into my head, and immediately, without thought or planning, rush out to acquire the items needed for my newest experiment. Sometimes the outcome is pretty good, and other times my interest fizzles before the idea comes to fruition.

The point is, this chapter of my life is an endless maze with so many twists and turns, ups and downs. There is so much to write about! Some days are hilarious and some are heartbreaking. One day I might write about a new recipe I tried, and another day I might write about a new embarrassing moment (and these are becoming more and more frequent). On some days, I may find that nothing of interest has happened, although I'm realizing that sometimes there are lessons to be learned in the simplest of happenings.

Diaper duty calls!

Life is Beautiful...and Exhausting

2009-10-20T14:01:00.001-07:00

It is soooo wonderful not to be pregnant anymore! Also wonderful is the fact that my recovery this time has been so much easier than last! But before I go into the whole story I really need to say thank you to my AMAZING husband. Unfortunately, he did not marry a Super Mom. He married a Holy-Crap-I-Don't-Know-What-I'm-Doing Mom. Ryan has been a lifesaver in every way! He had a week off after Gaby was born and he spent the week mostly trying to give Tyler as much attention as possible. But he also never stopped asking what he could do for me and how he could help with Gaby. He even took her to the doctor by himself when she needed to get her bilirubin level checked a couple of days after we came home. He helps with her when she wakes up during the night, he changes diapers, he does laundry, and he is so cute with both of his kids. So, despite my lack of "Super Mom-ness" I am well aware that I married a Super Husband/Dad and I am so grateful for everything he does for us! I love you Ry!

So for anyone who is interested in the labor story, here's how it went:

9:00 am - arrive at hospital
9:30 - check into room
9:35 - am asked to pee in a cup and for the first time in 9 months, am unable to pee.
11:00 - hooked up to Pitocin, mild contractions, am still smiling
1:30 - doctor arrives, breaks my water
1:40 - contractions getting much stronger, am no longer smiling
2:00 - anesthesiologist enters and I immediately become terrified because it is very obvious that he is the "all-business, no talk" sort of doctor
2:20 - anesthesiologist leaves after having successfully STABBED me in the back and SHOVED a tube into my spine, not even asking if I was ok after I burst into tears
3:00 - my legs are completely asleep but I can still feel the contractions
3:30 - turn down the nurse's offer to call the anesthesiologist
4:40 - doctor returns and it's time to push
4:56 - Gaby is born!

Things are good, but I'm still not sure how to carry on with normal life with two kids. Unlike another amazing person I know who came to get Ty the other day and carted him around along with her own three boys as if it was no big deal (thank you AGAIN!), I HAVE NO IDEA how to take multiple children to a grocery store or anywhere out of the house. Maybe I'll figure it out sometime in the next year or so. For now we're just trying to survive through these sleepless first weeks and I guess the rest will come.

Life is Beautiful...and Exhausting

2009-10-20T14:01:00.000-07:00

It is soooo wonderful not to be pregnant anymore! Also wonderful is the fact that my recovery this time has been so much easier than last! But before I go into the whole story I really need to say thank you to my AMAZING husband. Unfortunately, he did not marry a Super Mom. He married a Holy-Crap-I-Don't-Know-What-I'm-Doing Mom. Ryan has been a lifesaver in every way! He had a week off after Gaby was born and he spent the week mostly trying to give Tyler as much attention as possible. But he also never stopped asking what he could do for me and how he could help with Gaby. He even took her to the doctor by himself when she needed to get her bilirubin level checked a couple of days after we came home. He helps with her when she wakes up during the night, he changes diapers, he does laundry, and he is so cute with both of his kids. So, despite my lack of "Super Mom-ness" I am well aware that I married a Super Husband/Dad and I am so grateful for everything he does for us! I love you Ry!

This is one of Ry and Gaby's first daddy-daughter chats. He's teaching her important things like:

how he's going to look at ANY boy who comes looking for her. And...

that the only types of kisses that will be allowed until she's at least 21 are Eskimo kisses.

Poor Tyler has to compete a little bit for attention now and he does get a little jealous some days, but he is such a sweetheart and has been so cute to his little sister.

"Mom, what's this?"

Profile of cheeks

Pondering the mysteries of life.

So for anyone who is interested in the labor story, here's how it went:

9:00 am - arrive at hospital
9:30 - check into room
9:35 - am asked to pee in a cup and for the first time in 9 months, am unable to pee.
11:00 - hooked up to Pitocin, mild contractions, am still smiling
1:30 - doctor arrives, breaks my water
1:40 - contractions getting much stronger, am no longer smiling
2:00 - anesthesiologist enters and I immediately become terrified because it is very obvious that he is the "all-business, no talk" sort of doctor
2:20 - anesthesiologist leaves after having successfully STABBED me in the back and SHOVED a tube into my spine, not even asking if I was ok after I burst into tears
3:00 - my legs are completely asleep but I can still feel the contractions
3:30 - turn down the nurse's offer to call the anesthesiologist
4:40 - doctor returns and it's time to push
4:56 - Gaby is born!

Things are good, but I'm still not sure how to carry on with normal life with two kids. Unlike another amazing person I know who came to get Ty the other day and carted him around along with her own three boys as if it was no big deal (thank you AGAIN!), I HAVE NO IDEA how to take multiple children to a grocery store or anywhere out of the house. Maybe I'll figure it out sometime in the next year or so. For now we're just trying to survive through these sleepless first weeks and I guess the rest will come.

Megan's Book Club

2009-09-29T13:20:00.001-07:00

Nope, no baby yet. Three more days. To pass the time today I decided I would post on the many great books I've read (also to pass the time, mostly late at night when sleep wouldn't come) in the past couple of months. The list is pretty random, but I have some great recommendations if you're interested (in no particular order).

The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society

This is probably my favorite of the whole bunch. I just finished reading this for book club and I LOVED IT! It's written completely as a collection of letters and is about an author who corresponds with a man who lives on the island of Guernsey in the English Channel. He tells her about this society that was formed during the time of the German occupation of the island and she becomes interested in writing and publishing something about them. In the process she becomes friends with all of these people and becomes really involved in their lives.

It's interesting, funny, happy and sad all at the same time. I loved that there was nothing trashy in it. It's definitely one I'll be buying for my own collection.

What's So Great About America?
This book was written by an immigrant from India who has lived here for 20 years and is now a citizen. It was written after September 11, and he talks about the reasons why the terrorists did what they did. He presents their point of view, and those of others outside as well as inside of the United States who claim that this country is evil. He talks about his own opinions of the U.S. as well, and certain things he dislikes, but then goes on to affirm the reasons why America IS in fact great and why all of the arguments that the U.S. is evil and what those arguments are based on are absolutely and utterly incorrect. It not only gives a great lesson in the history of our country and those of several others (where relevant), but also reminds us that we are truly blessed to be citizens of this country. I think everyone should read this, and I would especially like to send a copy to Michelle Obama who, during the election stated that for the first time in her adult life she's proud of her country. Yep, that's our First Lady. I won't continue with how I feel about that.

Wake Up to a Happier Life
This is Amanda Dickson's book and it's just another that I simply loved. Simple ways to CHOOSE to be happier no matter what is going on in life. The next book kind of goes along the same lines:

Toss the Guilt and Catch the Joy
Same kind of thing, but she focuses on not worrying so much about things that really don't matter. Great book!

Princess Academy

Everyone has probably heard of this one. I had too, but hadn't read it until last week. It was so cute! Simple and a really quick read, but it had some great themes and a great ending! Well, I thought so anyway. I hear there's a sequel. Does anyone know if that's true?

Recovering Charles
I got this one free with a purchase at Deseret Book. It's by the author of The Wednesday Letters which is also a really great book. This one is about a man who goes to New Orleans after Hurricane Katrina to try to find his missing father. It's all about forgiveness and understanding, but it also made me want to go back and reread the news stories and see the pictures of what New Orleans was like after the hurricane. Although it's a fictional story, it was really interesting to read about what life might have been like during and after Katrina.

Freakonomics

Another book club read. A lesson on cause and effect in this country and why it may not be what it seems to be. I thought it might be kind of boring, but it wasn't. It really kept my interest and made me look at certain things in a different way.

The Great and Terrible series
This series has six volumes. After I picked up the first last month, I could not put them down. The first book is set in the pre-existence and introduces the characters as brothers and sisters. It's so interesting because of how life there is described. They live in a beautiful city, ruled by God and they now have a choice to make because two plans have been presented. Many choose to follow Lucifer, and it tells about the war in heaven and how Lucifer and his spirits are cast out. The following books follow the characters from the first book during parts of their earth lives and the setting is the last days. The main conflict being war in the Middle East and corruption in the governments there and in the United States that causes disaster here.

These books are fiction, but what happens in them is so possible, and maybe even probable, that it made me start checking off a list in my head of things we still need to be prepared for this kind of a disaster. It was scary to think about things like this actually happening, but inspiring to see how the characters in the book got through it and continued stronger than before. I felt like the prevailing theme was that since the beginning we have had the strength to overcome Evil, and we always will, no matter what happens in the world.

Names of all the books: The Brothers, Where Angles Fall, The Second Sun, Fury and Light, From the End of Heaven, and Clear as the Moon.

The Chosen One
Carol Lynch Williams was one of the organizers of the writing conference I went to this summer. I hadn't heard of this book until I went to the conference and picked it up there. It's about a girl living in a polygamist colony. Interesting to read about how a community like that works, but I guess the most prevalent emotion for me while reading this book was anger because of the way they treated anyone who would not conform. And I felt sad to think that there are children having to accept this. But it was also interesting to get an idea of how the wives felt about each other and their situation, and what the husbands' feelings were towards their wives and also the leadership of their community.

So, aside from three David Baldacci books that I permitted myself to indulge in, I think that's about it. But let me show you what I'm reading now, at the risk of being laughed at:

I know. Totally random. But I'll let you all know what I think about it when I'm done!

Megan's Book Club

2009-09-29T13:20:00.000-07:00

Nope, no baby yet. Three more days. To pass the time today I decided I would post on the many great books I've read (also to pass the time, mostly late at night when sleep wouldn't come) in the past couple of months. The list is pretty random, but I have some great recommendations if you're interested (in no particular order).

The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society

This is probably my favorite of the whole bunch. I just finished reading this for book club and I LOVED IT! It's written completely as a collection of letters and is about an author who corresponds with a man who lives on the island of Guernsey in the English Channel. He tells her about this society that was formed during the time of the German occupation of the island and she becomes interested in writing and publishing something about them. In the process she becomes friends with all of these people and becomes really involved in their lives.

It's interesting, funny, happy and sad all at the same time. I loved that there was nothing trashy in it. It's definitely one I'll be buying for my own collection.

What's So Great About America?
This book was written by an immigrant from India who has lived here for 20 years and is now a citizen. It was written after September 11, and he talks about the reasons why the terrorists did what they did. He presents their point of view, and those of others outside as well as inside of the United States who claim that this country is evil. He talks about his own opinions of the U.S. as well, and certain things he dislikes, but then goes on to affirm the reasons why America IS in fact great and why all of the arguments that the U.S. is evil and what those arguments are based on are absolutely and utterly incorrect. It not only gives a great lesson in the history of our country and those of several others (where relevant), but also reminds us that we are truly blessed to be citizens of this country. I think everyone should read this, and I would especially like to send a copy to Michelle Obama who, during the election stated that for the first time in her adult life she's proud of her country. Yep, that's our First Lady. I won't continue with how I feel about that.

Wake Up to a Happier Life
This is Amanda Dickson's book and it's just another that I simply loved. Simple ways to CHOOSE to be happier no matter what is going on in life. The next book kind of goes along the same lines:

Toss the Guilt and Catch the Joy
Same kind of thing, but she focuses on not worrying so much about things that really don't matter. Great book!

Princess Academy

Everyone has probably heard of this one. I had too, but hadn't read it until last week. It was so cute! Simple and a really quick read, but it had some great themes and a great ending! Well, I thought so anyway. I hear there's a sequel. Does anyone know if that's true?

Recovering Charles
I got this one free with a purchase at Deseret Book. It's by the author of The Wednesday Letters which is also a really great book. This one is about a man who goes to New Orleans after Hurricane Katrina to try to find his missing father. It's all about forgiveness and understanding, but it also made me want to go back and reread the news stories and see the pictures of what New Orleans was like after the hurricane. Although it's a fictional story, it was really interesting to read about what life might have been like during and after Katrina.

Freakonomics

Another book club read. A lesson on cause and effect in this country and why it may not be what it seems to be. I thought it might be kind of boring, but it wasn't. It really kept my interest and made me look at certain things in a different way.

Common Sense
Oh yes. I read it. And it's now on the top of my list. For all of you who think Glenn Beck is the face of Republican propaganda, I recommend reading this. Yes he is conservative. But he's made it his business to uncover corruption in government on BOTH sides and if you've watched his show lately, you'll see that he's been very successful. Not that any media outlets are giving his discoveries ANY coverage at all, which was SO upsetting to me when he recently broke the stories of outrageous practices at Acorn. Yes, the Acorn that is funded by the government and endorsed by Mr. Obama himself, caught on camera encouraging prostitution, illegal immigration, and tax evasion among other things. I was absolutely stunned when I saw this video. And they uncovered it not just at one Acorn location but at eight.

*To appease Ryan, I'll note here that currently there ARE numerous media outlets covering this story. About time.

But this isn't just about President Obama. This book is about the corruption that has been infiltrating the government for years! The fact that there are no term limits and so corrupt people can stay in office until they die. About the fact that the American people, when polled, say they are extremely dissatisfied with congress but then we all elect the SAME people back into office. It's about the fact that BOTH Democrats and Republicans are allowing things to happen that the founding fathers NEVER intended for this country.

Ok, sorry...didn't mean to get up on my soapbox, but there it is. And this is a good lead-in to my next recommendation.

The Great and Terrible series
This series has six volumes. After I picked up the first last month, I could not put them down. The first book is set in the pre-existence and introduces the characters as brothers and sisters. It's so interesting because of how life there is described. They live in a beautiful city, ruled by God and they now have a choice to make because two plans have been presented. Many choose to follow Lucifer, and it tells about the war in heaven and how Lucifer and his spirits are cast out. The following books follow the characters from the first book during parts of their earth lives and the setting is the last days. The main conflict being war in the Middle East and corruption in the governments there and in the United States that causes disaster here.

These books are fiction, but what happens in them is so possible, and maybe even probable, that it made me start checking off a list in my head of things we still need to be prepared for this kind of a disaster. It was scary to think about things like this actually happening, but inspiring to see how the characters in the book got through it and continued stronger than before. I felt like the prevailing theme was that since the beginning we have had the strength to overcome Evil, and we always will, no matter what happens in the world.

Names of all the books: The Brothers, Where Angles Fall, The Second Sun, Fury and Light, From the End of Heaven, and Clear as the Moon.

The Chosen One
Carol Lynch Williams was one of the organizers of the writing conference I went to this summer. I hadn't heard of this book until I went to the conference and picked it up there. It's about a girl living in a polygamist colony. Interesting to read about how a community like that works, but I guess the most prevalent emotion for me while reading this book was anger because of the way they treated anyone who would not conform. And I felt sad to think that there are children having to accept this. But it was also interesting to get an idea of how the wives felt about each other and their situation, and what the husbands' feelings were towards their wives and also the leadership of their community.

So, aside from three David Baldacci books that I permitted myself to indulge in, I think that's about it. But let me show you what I'm reading now, at the risk of being laughed at:

I know. Totally random. But I'll let you all know what I think about it when I'm done!

Nine Months

2009-09-18T16:45:00.000-07:00

Well here it is, the middle of my 9th month. I feel like I'm a total wimp when it comes to pregnancy anyway, and so it doesn't really help that this time has been even harder than the last. I'm a whole lot bigger (and NOT just in the stomach area), I'm retaining a whole lot more fluid, and I have pains that I didn't have before. But I've also realized how humorous the 9th month of pregnancy can be. I thought I would share some of these things.

YOU KNOW YOU'RE NINE MONTHS PREGNANT WHEN:

-You seriously weigh the pros and cons of getting up to go to the bathroom. Is it going to be more painful to heft yourself out of the chair you've settled into than to just deal with the "gotta go" feeling?

-Your emotions take a rollercoaster ride daily. One person you see says you are a whole lot smaller than she ever was, and the next asks if you're having twins and wonders quietly to herself (or sometimes not quietly at all!) why you're not at the hospital in labor instead of at the checkout counter at Shopko.

-You go to bed with one chin and wake up the following morning with two.

-Your stomach hangs out the bottom of almost every maternity shirt you own.

-Your little boy gets hurt and is screaming but since you don't see any blood, you stay where you are, figuring he'll get over it.

-If the phone isn't right next to you, whoever is calling is going to be ignored until you're forced to get up for your next bathroom break.

-Your doctor tells you you only have two more weeks to wait before being induced, and you feel so relieved. Then you get in your car and burst into tears because...YOU HAVE TWO MORE WEEKS!

-You wake up in the middle of the night gasping for breath as if you're in the middle of running a marathon. (Not that I will EVER know how that really feels.)

-The bras that are a cup size bigger than the ones you wore before you got pregnant are TOO SMALL!

-You feel like you're a toddler all over again because you're constantly tripping, running into things or people, walking around with some sort of food all over your shirt, and spilling whatever you happen to be trying to drink. In fact, you do all of these things more often than your child who IS a toddler.

-When you prepare yourself to get up from your chair or bed, your little boy starts to imitate the grunting noises that he has gotten so used to hearing.

-Sneezing is extremely dangerous and may require a change of clothes afterward.

-You eat ice cream multiple times every day and still feel that it's not enough (ok, maybe this isn't so much a pregnancy thing as a ME thing).

-You have wardrobe malfunctions daily. There's always something showing or sticking out that should not be showing or sticking out. Unfortunately, it is very probable that you've stopped caring.

Just a few of the many joys. Feel free to add to this list. Well...hopefully I won't be blogging again until Gaby is here. October 2 will not get here quickly enough.

Car Trouble, Confusion, Conferences and a whole lot of COUGHING!

2009-06-16T19:15:00.000-07:00

Ok, I have decided that I will never again say anything about ANYTHING before it's final EVER again. Remember how my last post was about how nice it is when things just "fall into place"? Weeell let's just say that things fell out all over the place right after I posted that.

Ryan and I have both owned Honda Civics for the last few years and have really liked them. They're great cars! Very dependable, good quality, etc, etc. Well, this year our cars decided to play a little game with us called "Let's Take Turns Getting Sick." So at the end of last year Ryan's car needed some very minor repairs. No big deal, his muffler just FELL OFF on one end as we're driving through Park City. Ok, fine, not a huge problem. We both use my car until it's done, end of story. Except THEN my car decided that it would be fun if her passenger window got stuck in the down position in the middle of winter. We didn't have the money to fix that one right away so Ryan custom-built a "Vote For Jim Matheson" window replacement. I mean, not that I don't LIKE feeling like white trash driving down the road, but it was a LITTLE hard to see through. Besides the fact that it was after the elections were over so it's not as if we looked like die-hard Jim Matheson supporters. No, we really just looked like white trash (for the second time that year if you count the muffler-dragging episode).

So we finally get that fixed somehow and we have two working cars again...for all of about one week. Thelonius (Ryan's car) remembers that it's his turn and decides to do something a little more exciting. The transmission...and about a zillion other little things. We almost decide to just part with him rather than spend all the money it will take to get him back in working order, but then we decide, "Aw heck, let's just fix him. We'll get another couple good years out of him and avoid a car payment." So, we do that. He's fixed. Two working cars again. For two weeks.

I bet you know who's got problems now! That's right! Little Goldilocks! Everything's good and then one Sunday after having already gone and come home from church in her, I go back outside to go to a meeting...and the car won't start. But it DOES start beeping and all the blinkers and tailights start blinking. Well, turns out, there was an alarm installed in the car before we got it, but it wasn't activated, nor did we have a control for it, it was just there. Well it picked this particular day to think I was breaking in (seriously? I mean did I like SMELL different or something?) and didn't let me start the car. And it messed up a bunch of other electrical stuff and killed the battery. AHHHHH!!!!!

Lucky for us, a friend of a friend that happened to come to our house that day was able to fix it a couple days later at very little cost. YAY! And things started to look up! That woman popped up out of no where when we needed someone to buy our contract, we got everything moved and got settled smoothly.

Two days after we moved, I'm headed up the canyon to go to a doctor's appointment and wrap some other stuff up. I'm in Ryan's car (yes, it is his turn at this point, but I thought the game was over!). Rattling noise...starts softly and then gets louder and the car starts shaking and I barely have time to pull over before it dies completely. Stranded at mile marker 173. Wonderful. After being rescued by AAA and my aunt I finally get into Park City (after having missed my appointment completely) and I get a phone call from the management company saying that this lady can no longer move in. Again...just wonderful.

Two days later we find out that the engine in Ryan's car has blown up. The mechanic tells me he'll buy the car from me for $200. Instead I opted to sell it on KSL and got $650. So, Thelonius now belongs to a man from Armenia. Happy trails Thelonius.

On another note, I went to the Writing and Illustrating for Young Reader Conference at BYU last week and it was awesome!! Every morning we met in small groups of 13 (and with and author) to read each other's manuscripts and give feedback. I had a wonderful group and our author was Lael Littke who is just amazing! She looks like Ryan's Grandma Pat. She's written and published 43 books and is still going. Besides getting great feedback about my own book, I learned so much about the publishing process and what it takes to really be successful as a writer. I feel completely driven now to do what I need to do to make this book great and try to get it out there! I've also been able to expand more on the ideas I already had for my second book, which is going to be completely different from my first one. So, it was definitely a successful week and really worth it.

But...this week I have the flu. Go figure.

Something new for Mother's Day

2009-05-11T08:48:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was Mother's Day and Ryan gave me a Hot Wheels ice cream truck. I hugged him tightly for being so thoughtful and then felt like I wanted cry.

After Ryan and I got married, I moved into the apartment Ry already lived in here in PC. We lovingly dubbed the apartment complex Little Mexico because of the feeling that we were truly living in a different country there. Loud music, people ringing bells to sell things, the bread man in his van with the loudspeaker on top, and the ice cream truck showing up at all hours of the day and night. We laughed about all of this stuff a lot, but there were also times, usually when it was past 10 at night, that I felt like screaming and throwing things at the ice cream truck or at the person who decided to crank his car stereo full blast because he thought everyone in the complex needed a good night lullaby. When I was pregnant with Tyler I got especially irritated and there were a couple nights I made Ryan go outside and ask the ice cream man to turn off his music. I have vivid memories of my pregnancy and Tyler's first year in that apartment. It was hilarious and frustrating and special all at the same time. For the past 9 months or so we have lived in a different, much quieter place that is only seconds away from that first apartment, but seems a world away. We joke about missing the ice cream man and all the mariachi music, and actually feeling at home when we went to visit family in Mexico for Christmas.

This has been our home for close to three years, since we got married. This is the married life that I know. I don't know what it's like to be married and be in a big ward. I only know what it's like to be married and feel like I'm still serving a mission in a small branch where everyone speaks a different language. All I know is what it's like to have sacrament meeting in the old Park City seminary building, and what it's like to feel so happy when more people show up than can fit in the room. All I know is what it feels like to be absolutely needed in every way and how fulfilling that is. All I know is how wonderful it is to be able to attend baptisms sometimes more than once a week even here in Utah. All I know is how much I love the people I have met here and how much I will miss them.

We're moving at the end of the month, and I've been crying every day since the day last week that we really felt it was the right thing for us to do. We'll only be an hour away, but life will be so different than it was here. This time has been challenging in so many ways, but so wonderful and fulfilling in many others. I'm so grateful for the time we spent here and for all that I've learned because of it. I know that there will be other "ice cream trucks" and many more good memories and experiences to come. But I'm sad that our new baby won't share in this special time we had here.

I hope all of you wonderful women had a great Mother's Day full of whatever may be meaningful to each of you!!

Pizza

2009-03-27T09:44:00.000-07:00

I enjoy pizza. Pepperoni pizza mostly, but there is also a place in my heart for the Pizza Hut Meat Lovers, artery-clogging variety. There's even one at Main Street Pizza and Noodle in Park City called The Cholesterol Hiker that I absolutely adore! Ok, so I guess the most important ingredient for me is meat. If the pizza doesn't have meat on it in some variety, don't expect me to put it in my mouth.

I've tried pizza in many different places, and it's so different everywhere. You would expect pizza in Italy to be the best since, supposedly, that's where it hails from. And maybe Chelsie would disagree with me since she doesn't like meat, but the pizza we had in Italy...NOT the best. In fact, I was quite disappointed. It was nothing much more than a thin crust, sauce and cheese. I might need a second go around with it to change my opinion (hint, hint husband).

Pizza in Brazil was interesting. Tuna pizza, corn pizza, corn and BACON pizza, shrimp pizza, palm heart pizza, etc. Some were not the best, but there was one that I absolutely ADORED! Frango e catupiry pizza. Chicken and catupiry cheese. Now Brad will tell you that this kind of cheese is gross. "It's nothing but nasty, white Velveeta." I, Brad, will respectfully disagree. It is SO GOOD! Nothing like Velveeta! And it was great on pizza with chicken! Maybe YOU need another go around on this one Brad! :)

There is another kind of "pizza" that is close to my heart and that is the Mexican Pizza from Su Casa. It is my FAVORITE fake Mexican food. Ground beef (it has to be ground beef or no deal), and beans inside two crispy flour tortillas, covered with melted cheese, enchilada sauce, tomatoes, sour cream and guacamole (again, NO olives, or NO deal). It is divine!! Even my dad, who complains about every single Mexican restaurant he has ever been to that is NOT in Mexico, enjoyed the Mexican pizza. He SAID he didn't when I brought one home for me after work one night and then HE ate it all. But then the next time I worked at Su Casa he called asking for one. Yeah, it's good.

Well, last week I almost had a heart attack when Ryan brought home three different kinds of leftover pizza from a lunch meeting he had.

#1 - The Pesto Pie - parmesan, pesto and SOY NUTS! Uh, WHAT?
#2 - The Jupiter Pie - olive oil, spinach, sun-dried tomatoes, and FETA. Again...Uh, WHAT?!

and the winner...

#3 - Artichoke Heart Pizza - no description needed.

I wanted to call Fuego Pizzeria and ask them what business they have putting artichoke hearts and bird food on a pizza! Who ARE you people?! Ok, I know, no disrespect to all you who love this stuff (Chels, if this sounds good to you, GREAT! I'll give you the address later), but SERIOUSLY?

After seeing that, I made Ryan take me to Pizza Hut where I ordered the meatiest pizza I could stomach. And I enjoyed every bite! For three days.

...I don't think I belong in Park City. I don't eat hummus and I don't shop at Whole Foods and I don't eat birdseed pizza. Even so, much love to all of you who do. I'm off to the kitchen to find something fattening to eat.

P.S. Yes, I'm going to be that old lady who has people sneak food that the doctor has forbidden into the nursing home

Texting Faux Pas

2009-03-24T10:08:00.000-07:00

Lately Tyler has been getting more educated about how to use a cell phone. If he's going to play with it, it has to be a real phone, it has to be on, and it has to be unlocked. Otherwise he wants nothing to do with it. This morning while playing on our bed he saw my phone and started playing. I was still half asleep and therefore happy that he had found something to keep him occupied for a little while longer. A few minutes later I looked over and noticed that the "sending picture..." screen was up. A couple of seconds later I saw that this was the picture he had sent...

...TO THE MISSIONARIES!!

I'm not quite sure what to do here. They already knew I was pregnant so it's obviously not an announcement of any kind (and NO I wouldn't announce it this way to the ELDERS anyway!). Do I just call them and explain that my 17-month-old son just randomly figured out how to send THEM this particular picture? That it's not a threat of any kind, and that I will gladly talk to their mission president should he have any questions about this highly irregular picture that is now taking up space on their phone? Or do I just wait until I see them on Sunday and see if they ask about it. At this moment are they wondering which of their companions (there are three of them) Sister Jensen was directing this picture to? Are they arguing over what it's supposed to mean? Are they glaring at each other accusingly, trying to remember if any one of them has been alone for any amount of time in the past couple of months?

...excuse me, I think I have a phone call to make.

Mommy Memos

2009-03-16T11:23:00.000-07:00

When I was younger I was never a "kid lover." You know, one of those people who just LOVES children, loves to babysit, loves to always be playing with kids. Not that I didn't LIKE small children and babies. They were fun to hold and talk to and play with for short spans of time, but not hours! I would read the Babysitters Club series and love the idea of being in a babysitting club, and my next-door-neighbor and I even started a babysitting service and handed out fliers and all. But every time I had a babysitting job I wouldn't look forward to it. I would dread it! I thought that maybe it was because at that point (when I was 12 or 13) I already had a little brother at home that I had to take care of at times. But that wasn't really it. There were people with multiple brothers and sisters I knew that had to help take care of them and LOVED it, AND loved babysitting. So I decided that I just wasn't one of those people who would make a great mother one day. Those people who seem to be BORN to be moms. Like my sister-in-law Monica. She's amazing with kids and always has been (plus she's not boastful about the fact that she's a great mom, which I LOVE and which I think makes her an even greater mom!).

Anyway, before I had Tyler I was genuinely afraid that I would suck as a mom and not really know how to take care of him, or maybe even (GASP!) not enjoy it! But the very second that Tyler was born and placed on my stomach, something inside me clicked. The tears came and I instantly knew that I would be fine and that I would love my time with him. And I have. Not that there aren't moments when I go nuts and feel like screaming. No, there are plenty of those. But I'm so thankful that for me, the "mothering instinct" did actually turn on and didn't stay dormant for the rest of my life. I did finally gain confidence in myself as a mother, though it is definitely challenging and even though I know I will have so much to learn at every stage of my children's lives. I know I'll try and fail and have to try again, but it's something I'm excited about.

I think my favorite blog posts to read are those of friends and family who talk about the new things their children are learning. I've become so fascinated with how children's brains work and how they learn new things. Each child is so different and learns new things at different times than others, but no matter when those new things start, I love hearing about them. I love hearing about the funny things they say and how they interact with siblings or other children, and how the characters of their parents can start showing through them so early!

Recently I read about a book that was written (I don't remember the title) about how parents really don't have any influence over what their child will be like because children are just born with a certain character that can't be changed. That's the biggest load of BULL that I've ever heard! Yes, every kid has a character that is different from others, but every kid is also influenced by their parents or those around them every single day. The act of NOT trying to teach them something because you believe they can't be taught or molded is in itself teaching them something. Something harmful, but it's teaching them something nonetheless.

One of this woman's main points was that it doesn't do a thing to teach a child religion at an early age because they'll just go off and do whatever they want when they get older. This part was utterly laughable and unbelievable to me. Yes, eventually kids grow into adults that make their own decisions, and some don't follow the same things their parents believe. But...really??! Kids that are taught morals, values, and respect and love of God turn out no better than those who were taught NOTHING? Kids who are taught to pray when they're young don't generally keep up the practice and teach their own kids to pray someday? Even if they don't continue in any religion, the values they learned don't help them AT ALL in life? I think it's so sad these kinds of lies are being propogated today. The lie that parents don't have any responsibility for their kids. How awful is that?

The past couple of months Tyler has been starting to fold his arms when we say prayer (only for the first few seconds at the beginning and then maybe somewhere in the middle or towards the end for a few seconds), but this last week I've noticed his understanding grow a little bit. Ty and I were at a baptism on Saturday. During the song he was playing with something and not paying any attention to what was going on (other than to dance for a couple seconds when the music started). The second the song was over he put down what he was playing with and folded his arms. Before anyone had even gotten up to start praying. The same thing in Sacrament meeting. After the song ended ( he was sitting with someone else because I was playing, but I saw him do it) he immediately folded his arms. Even during the sacrament, after having folded his arms the first time after the song ended, he folded his arms again when it was time for the water to be blessed. Such a simple thing, but it melted my heart because it made me really realize how impressionable they are even at such a young age. Lately Tyler is nuts during Sacrament Meeting and it's been really hard for me to get him to stay in one place for longer than a couple of minutes, but he's starting to understand that prayers are special. If he can understand that at 17 months, how many more important things will we be able to teach him in the coming years that will hopefully help him throughout his life? Even when he does ultimately make his own choices.

I'm so thankful for the gift of being a mother. It's so precious. I feel sad for all those who have children that they aren't thankful for. But I'm so thankful for all of YOU who are wonderful examples to me as you raise your children! There are so many out there who haven't been blessed with this gift. If you have children, go hug them, be grateful for them and teach them every good thing you can while you have the chance.

You've Got Mail

2009-03-09T21:23:00.000-07:00

Yes, I did get mail...and it was one of those envelopes that I dreaded seeing. Like a bill, but worse. It was addressed to me, yet that same address had been typed on my own computer. I knew what it was the second I saw it. I prepared that envelope myself and included it in the package just as they instructed. For "notification," they said. Well, I've been notified. They are thankful that I shared my work with them, but it was not chosen (among the 600 entries) as this year's winner.

I was disappointed for the rest of the day because I truly had gotten my hopes up. And the truth is, I don't think getting your hopes up is a bad thing! It was only my hopes that even got me to write 30 chapters of a book in the first place. So a little disappointment after the first try is ok. The next day, I got myself out of my disappointment and started looking for my next step. And I found it!

Every summer BYU hosts the Writing and Illustrating for Young Readers Workshop. It's a week-long conference for anywhere from beginning to advanced aspiring writers. Authors, editors and agents come from all over the country to teach seminars and workshops and even to find new writing talent, which, according to an article in the Boston Globe, they have in fact been finding there. I registered and will be attending in June! I'm so excited! It's five full days of writing, learning, sharing, and getting feedback on your work. The mornings are dedicated to working in groups of 13 with an award-winning author. I'll be working with Lael Littke, who has written a total of about 43 books, mostly for young adults. We're supposed to have at least a few pages of a book started to share with the 12 others in the group. I'm so excited to get feedback from an author about what I've already written!

So, my plan is REVISE, REVISE, REVISE until June and then after the conference (and hopefully after making some great contacts and learning a bit more about the whole process of getting a book published) REVISE, REVISE, REVISE some more, and then see where I go from there. In order to get published with a big company, it's necessary to have an agent, so that would probably be the next step.

Anyway, in the next month or so I would like to have a couple of people read my manuscript to get some feedback that way as well. I'm probably going to ask my little brother and cousin to read it since they are in the target age group, but I would also like to get some suggestions from adults as well. I would like it to be an interesting book for any age group. So let me know if you would be interested in helping me out that way. Just a warning. The book has a lot to do with something that's a little bit of a controversy right now. Immigration. One of the main reasons I wrote it is because I feel it important for specifically American youth to see a side of this issue that is not normally seen. The personal side of it. The human side that requires us to be a little more compasionate. So, I'm asking that if you read it, you leave aside any and all predisposition or judgement you may have on this subject now and have an open mind. Keep in mind that most of the characters' experiences that I incorporated into my story are true.

So, there's the plan! I'm excited to go forward with it and I'm so excited to learn all I can in June. After all, I'm not an English major, or anything even CLOSE! So I do have a lot to learn. And education is never a bad investment.

Little Nettie

2009-03-03T08:52:00.000-08:00

This is my FAVORITE new item this year. I know it looks like either a mini watering can or a device used to ingest illegal substances, but it's not! It's one of the greatest inventions EVER. I could probably send it to Rachael Ray for Stump The Rach. It's called a Nettie (or Neti) Pot and it's my best friend. During pregnancy I always have awful sinus congestion, especially at night. And it's not blow-your-nose-and-it's-all-better type. I blow my nose and NOTHING happens. So, I usually have to get up two or three times a night to try do something so I can breathe! My dad found this little beauty and gave it to me about a month ago. I have to say I was afraid of it and didn't touch it until last week when I became desperate. Boy am I glad I finally tried it! Ten seconds with Little Nettie (yes, that's her name) before bed and I am FREE for the rest of the night. I LOVE IT! Now, I wasn't about to take a picture of myself using it, but here's one of of another overnight enthusiast. Everyone needs to see this. It's hilarious, and I can't believe I actually do this!

Sorry if you think this is gross, but I thought I would be nice and share this little secret with anyone else who might be having the same issues! Happy Nettiing!

Ni Hao, hope crusher!

2009-02-27T21:34:00.000-08:00

So, Thursday night I was craving noodles from Panda Express. Ryan, helpful as always, brought them home promptly. After taking two bites and then pushing them away, I turned to my fortune cookie, hoping for a little help. I told Ryan that my "fortune" would say that I was going to wake up the next morning feeling absolutely wonderful in every way and that I would continue to feel that way. I cracked the cookie open, eagerly sliding the small piece of paper out (ignoring the actual cookie which I never eat), and found these words:

"You have an overactive imagination."

Yeah, THANKS for the vote of confidence Panda Express fortune writers! Ryan laughed his guts out and I sat there trying to figure out what they have against me.

So, I decided to eat the cookie, thinking that maybe the fact that I hadn't wasted it this time would grant me something a little more helpful next time. And I did at least take comfort in my husband's fortune:

"You will inherit a large sum of money."

Diary of a Sick Pregnant Woman

2009-02-20T14:36:00.000-08:00

Monday:

(ring ring)
Megan: Hello?
Ryan: Hey, I'm filling up the car at the gas station, do you need me to pick anything up?
Megan: I really need a hot dog. A big fat one from 7-Eleven with everything on it. Please hurry!!
Ryan: No problem, see you in a bit!

later that night...

Megan: This is sooo good! Thank you!!

Tuesday:

(Megan is gagging in the bathroom as an awful smell permeates the air in the house)

Megan: (stepping into the kitchen, hand over mouth) WHAT are you making?
Ryan: A hot dog. Do you want one?
Megan: (with horrified look on face) You have to stop now! It's awful! (returns to the bathroom to keep retching)

Wednesday:

(ring ring)

Ryan: Hello?
Megan: Hi...so I think I need a hamburger for dinner tonight. Will you stop at the store on your way home and pick up a bag of hamburger patties?
Ryan: Of course, I love you!

later that night...

Megan: This is so perfect, thank you!!

Thursday:

(Ryan is home for lunch. Megan is in her bed with the covers over her head trying to keep from inhaling the TERRIBLE odor emanating from the kitchen)

Megan: (finally emerging from the bedroom after several minutes bonding with the toilet) No more cooking hamburgers. I can't handle it!

Friday:

(ring ring)

Ryan: Hello?
Megan: I need a McDonald's chicken sandwich, and some chicken nuggets for later.
Ryan: No problem. I'll be home soon!

later that night and half a sandwich later...

Ryan: How's your sandwich?
Megan: (eyes closed, hand over mouth, sandwich unfinished) I think I'm going to puke.

Saturday:

(Ryan, Megan and Tyler on their way to meet others in the branch to go to the Draper Temple open house. Must stop at the store first)

Megan: Ok, I need a bottle of water, yogurt-covered raisins and...something chocolatey...or something. Reese's Pieces.
Ryan: Be right back.

Ten minutes later...

Ryan: Ok, here's your water and yogurt-covered raisins, but they didn't have Reese's Pieces.
Megan: (staring at the yogurt-covered raisins in horror) So you didn't buy me anything chocolate?
Ryan: ...sorry. Should I go back in?
Megan: No, it's fine, we have to go (sliding offensive raisins back in grocery back and chucking them in the back seat while trying not to puke at the thought of them)

Ryan, thank you for sticking around. I love you!

The Self Help Elf

2009-02-11T09:33:00.000-08:00

I like to read. Lucky, since my mother probably owns and continues to buy every book published in the history of the world. Every book, that is, published by Deseret Book, Covenant or any other publisher of church books by authors with names like Brent Yorgason, Chris Heimerdinger and various other importantly initialled people. Maybe it's BECAUSE of this that I learned to love to read. Whatever the reason, I have lovingly dubbed my mother The Self Help Elf because of the way she finds a book for almost every situation in life.

Before my brother and I entered adolescence and were still normal, well-behaved (right mom?), carefree children, we just got to hear fun stories. Except the time when I was 5 or 6 and apparently asked where babies come from, then found the book my mom had gotten from the library about it that she had intended to read to us herself. I got to it first. It was complete with pictures and all. LITTLE bit of a different genre than Tennis Shoes Among the Nephites.

But then I turned 12 and Christmas and birthdays started to include books with names like Braces, Pimples and Jr. High or something very similar to that. Every year there were new ones, the subjects becoming increasingly more serious. Before I turned 16 there were books about NOT dating. Then after 16 there were books about dating, but dating carefully (one that I can recall was Dating: no guts, no glory). I think MOST of the books in my collection came during that period of time.

Then after high school graduation there were books about college, living on my own, cookbooks and, for a change, books about dating in college. After I met Ryan and professed to be smitten with him and wanting to marry him at age 19, my father joined the ranks of Self Help Elf-ism. He gave me a book, which he picked out all by himself, called How do I Know if I'm Really in Love? Apparently the book had the desired effect because Ryan and I broke up instead of getting married. Then we got back together after China and I received from my mother First Comes Love. A really great book that goes ahead and assumes that you have read the above mentioned book (not by the same author), and have decided that you ARE in love and how to proceed from there. Great book. Ryan and I broke up again. Maybe because he got a book entitled Are You Sure You Don't Want to Date Other People? She's Almost the Only Person You've Dated Since You Returned From Your Mission. I wouldn't be surprised if that book really exists.

About a year later I received another book. Where Do I Go From Here? Does the title say enough about what my life was like at this point? Well, it was basically a "no, just because you're not married at 21 doesn't mean you SHOULD go on a mission. There ARE other options." Great book, but I DID decide to go on a mission, and so proceeded to receive all sorts of mission-themed books.

Skip to after the mission. Ryan and I decided to get married (true to our whole relationship, NO it wasn't that simple, but for the purposes of this post, we'll skip to that). At my wedding shower I got a whole huge basket of books (because obviously this would be the MOST complicated thing I've ever gotten myself into). Included in this basket were The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands (by Dr. Laura), Strangling Your Husband is not an Option, and The Five Love Languages, among many others. A couple of weeks later my mom gave me one that she had forgotten to include in the basket: And They Were Not Ashamed. My dad was standing there and as my mother passed me the book, he tried to wrestle it away from me because, according to him "she doesn't need this. She's a good girl." (Yes, the book is about sex) I think he wanted to give me another copy of How Do I Know if I'm Really in Love? Anyway, ALL of the books have been extremely helpful because, I have to say, the first year of marriage definitely had it's difficult points and both of us learned a lot from various things in these books (although none of them instructed a husband as to how to proceed if his wife throws a block of cheese at him :)

Six months later I was pregnant. True to form, at the baby shower I got another basket of books, including What to Expect When You're Expecting, and other good reads on "forming your own family."

After Ty was born there were What to expect the first years, and the wonderful Jackrabbit Factor and Hidden Treasures. Some people go to therapists for help. I read. Education on ANY subject, is ALWAYS a good investment.

My question now is, what books do I need for the second time around?